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Will America ever run out of its ample supply of political bullshit?

Since the end of World War II, American politicians have used bullshit at an alarming rate. The rate of bullshit usage is so high, some scientists are saying that America is close to running out of political bullshit. Other researchers say America has barely tapped its share.

Scientist and leading Peak Bullshit proponent, Eugene Libby, said that each year American politicians are using up exponential amounts of bullshit, a trend that began in earnest in the mid-20th century. In the 1960s, for example, Libby said entire bullshit movements were created, causing further strain on the nation’s delicate supply of bullshit.

“Our national reservoirs of bullshit were pretty much used up by the beginning of the 1970s, forcing us to seek cheap overseas markets of bullshit,” Libby said. “The Middle East helped provide what seemed to be endless amounts of bullshit.”

“Politicians have become addicted to Middle East bullshit,” Libby said. “Imagine the political fortunes won and lost due to Middle East bullshit.”

According to Libby, globalization, the Clinton administration, and the discovery of a vast quantities of bullshit from Hugo Chavez’s regime in Venezuela in the 1990s compounded the bullshit problem. The American flag-pin-wearing days following 2001 terrorist attacks did little to abate the flow of political bullshit.

“If you look at the use of bullshit in this country, you really have to ask, are there any other places for us to get more bullshit?” Libby asked rhetorically. “It appears that our capacity for bullshit is entirely tapped out.”

Not so fast, said Professor A.J. Wheeley, America hasn’t begun to tap its domestic bullshit. New technological bullshit could also ease the burden of country’s bullshit producers.

“Anyone with any knowledge of the American political system knows that Americans can be pretty creative with bullshit,” Wheeley said. “Conserving bullshit is not in the lexicon.”

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