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Welfare Moms Celebrate ‘Keep Kids Away from Work Day’

April 24th, 2008 · 4 Comments

Keep Your Kids Away From Work Day

Welfare moms and kids unite to explore non-traditional occupations.

“What’s that?” asked little Johnson Benson as he stared in wild-eyed amazement at the streams of cars traveling on I-99 toward State College.

“They’re called commuters and they’re going to work,” replies his mother, Madine Selkers.

“Work? What’s that mommy?” Johnson said, raising his eyebrows.

“It’s a way for other people to enable my substance abuse, as well as provide us with a lifestyle of relative ease and border-line criminal behavior,” Selkers said. “These people owe us a living, Johnson, and you should avoid them.”

Today, thousands of Welfare mothers, mainly in Blair County and Bellefonte, will keep their children home from special education classes to teach them respect for mom’s commitment to permanent unemployment.

Madine Selkers, of Tyrone, said the special day doesn’t just help her educate her children and step-children on the opportunities of non-work available to them, the celebration also re-connects her with her own journey as a non-provider and lay-about.

“I actually earn some money under the table as an exotic dancer, but I called in and said I wouldn’t be in for my normal 10 p.m. to 12 a.m. shift due to this special day,” Selkers said. “I didn’t want to send a mixed message to my four kids and three step-children.”

Dawn Mae Talleyho, a Welfare recipient who resides in Bellefonte, said she is meeting a group of Welfare mothers and give the kids an idea of what a typical day for us.

“It’s really a learning experience,” said Talleyho. “Last year, my kids were, like, ‘Oh, mom, I never knew how little you did,’ They said I was ‘cool’ and you can’t hear that enough.”

Talleyho said they’ll wake up at noon or “maybe 1:30 p.m., depending.” They’ll throw on some old clothes and watch television until late afternoon.

Later, they’ll show kids how to score some weed and a case of beer from their current old man.

“I hope we instill in our children the belief that there are no glass cellars in Welfare and that it’s not about sitting on your butt all day doing nothing,” Telleyho said. “Sometimes, you have to get off that butt to score the weed and beer.”
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Tags: Bellefonte · Tyrone · Welfare

4 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Ricardo Almquist III // Apr 24, 2008 at 5:45 am

    I’m so glad State College isn’t plagued by these slovenly people. Yet another way Happy Valley is the perfect place to live and raise a family.

  • 2 Concerned // Apr 24, 2008 at 6:52 am

    State College is a great place to teach your children the values of looking down on others that is less fortunate than the folks of the almighty State College.

    Reminds me of my favorite joke: What is the difference between Porcupines and BMW’s?

    Porcupines have their pricks on the outside.

  • 3 Olga Lickenfelter // Apr 24, 2008 at 8:56 am

    It’s about time for these slovenly woment contribute to the degradation of their children. Why not home brew the beer or grow your own weed? Or at least contribute to the entreprenuerial spirit of the area and become a dealer? It’s a shame that kids nowadays don’t know how to contribute to thier own substance problems. What happens when the sugar daddies go away? These innocent kids may have to become thieves to continue this treasured way of life.

  • 4 Ricardo Almquist III // Apr 24, 2008 at 10:12 am

    “Reminds me of my favorite joke: What is the difference between Porcupines and BMW’s?

    Porcupines have their pricks on the outside.”

    Sounds like somebody has a chip on their shoulder. I can’t say as I blame you…

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