Veepstakes: Ghost of Vincent Foster Warns Obama

June 9th, 2008 · No Comments

Foster’s Ghost warns: Clintons assure two things–death and taxes.

Supporters close to Barack Obama said that the senator and presidential nominee has had an encounter with the paranormal.

According to the supporters, Obama was visited by the ghost of Vincent Foster, former Clinton aide and conspiracy subject, while staying at the notoriously haunted Renaissance Mayflower Hotel in Washington D.C.

Gil Gerard Shayweather, a supporter of Obama said, “The senator told us that Foster came to him and said simply, ‘You got two Clintons who are about one stray bullet away from the White House, you do the math,’” Shayweather said. “It was very creepy.”

“Foster then told Obama that if Clinton didn’t get him with an assassination attempt, she just might nag him to an early grave,” Shayweather said. “Especially about health care and her heroic trip to Bosnia, where she jumped on a live grenade, by the by.”

Foster also warned him not to take a trip to Arkansas. “But that was pretty much because the state sucks,” Shayweather said.

Paranormal experts said that its interesting because the Mayweather is reportedly haunted by Calvin Coolidge. Although, as a Republican, he, too, may have been voted out of Washington.

Obama also told supporters that his sleep was interrupted one more time that night when a figure that looked like Bill Clinton entered his room.

Obama told supporters that the figure entreated him, “C’mon, man, brother to brother, if you don’t get my wife the VP slot, she’s gonna be on my ass twenty-four-seven,” the ghost said. “I won’t have any time to be out banging super models and some stray Hollywood starlets. Have a heart.”

It was later revealed that the figure was actually Bill Clinton, who stumbled into Obama’s room by mistake, after misplacing his hooker.

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