|
Give us your shiftless, your indolent, your slugs yearning for free housing. For the past 20 years, Tyrone has become synonymous with that gritty, blue-collar determination to turn a once-thriving, hard-working middle class community into the shiftless, non-working underbelly of central Pennsylvania. Recognizing that, Tyrone just secured a little piece of subsidized history by attaining its 20th consecutive Section 8 Championship. The challenge pits communities against each other in a competition to build and maintain the most Section 8 housing units on a per capita basis. "It's really hard to put a good town down, but we did it," said Guy Fardley, president of Tyrone's Poor Planning Commission. "We preach consistency in this town. If you're digging yourself into a hole, keep digging." At one time, Tyrone had few public and Section 8 housing, but over the past 20 years the town has surpassed nearby communities for these types of units. The amount has far outstripped the demand for the locally indolent; the town is actually attracting bums from other towns, including major cities. "When you have people from New York City, Philadelphia, and Pittsburgh saying, I want to make Tyrone the place where I can not have a job and have other people raise my children," Fardley said. "Well, that's not something every town can say." Tamara Clacker, another member of the Tyrone Poor Planning Commission, said the town expects to encounter challenges over the next few years. With I-99 expected to be completed in the next millenium, the more affluent State College residents are seeking cheaper housing and an easy commute. This could cause an increase in real estate tax revenue and higher property values. "We're doing what we can to thwart this," Clacker said. "Putting a bunch of Godzilla-sized industrial wind turbines on the ridges should keep those rich, working jerks from polluting the community with their work ethic and increased tax base." Clacker said the town may be poor in some ways, but considers itself rich in poor infrastructure and poor planning.
|
