Nuts! Jackson Backs Neutering Stray Politicians

Barack Obama Jesse Jackson cut your nuts off

Race gets snippy: Barack beats scissors. Papers cover Barack.

The Reverend Jesse Jackson, leader of the Rainbow Coalition and director of United Eunuchs, wants action, not distraction, against an overpopulation of politicians.

In a recent interview in the second stall of the Fox News studio bathroom, Jackson said the overwhelming number of stray politicians who are issuing Civil Rights messages should be dealt with sooner, rather than later.

"There's too much talkin' and rappin'," said Jackson. "And not enough happenin'. People need to see works, not words."

Jackson said that he's particularly upset at the number of black politicians, like Barack Obama, who are straying into his territory as racial polemicist. Obama recently made comments indicating black fathers should be more responsible in familial duties. "Who's he to talk down to us, promptin' such hysteria," Jackson said. "How much raisin' did his papa do back in Nigeria."

According to Jackson, birth control is the only way to control the increasing numbers of Civil Rights operatives in the country who are cutting in on his turf. Neutering and spaying should be promoted as the best solution, since abstinence is unlikely to work.

"I say to all you jumpin' on the racial band wagon, why, you kinda laggin'," Jackson said. "There's only room on this showboat for one, yours truly, the Reverend Jesse Jackson."

"So folks remember to spay and neuter your cats and dogs," Jackson said. "The same goes for all y'all Civil Rights wogs."

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